Tuesday, October 14, 2008

10 Unknown Facts About Dwight D. Eisenhower

Ladies and Gentlemen, on this day in history in Denison, Texas in 1890 (1890!), the thirty fourth president of the United States was born. As such, today's Ten Facts Tuesday is about that man, Mr. Dwight Eisenhower, or as he was otherwise known for some inexplicable reason, Ike. He was commander of American forces in Europe during WWII and was put in charge of the U.S. occupied zone of German afterward. During his presidency, he supported desegregation, an interstate highway system, and Hawaii and Alaska joining the nation. But here are a few things you may not have known about this former president.

10 Unknown Facts about Dwight D. Eisenhower:
  1. Dwight D. Eisenhower isn't dead; he's serving as an ambassador to extra-terrestrial cultures. You think it's a coincidence he "died" so close to the Apollo Moon Landing? Oh that footage was faked all right, but not because we didn't land on the moon. It's because no cameras were allowed into the aliens' embassy.
  2. Dwight D. Eisenhower actually finished a game of Monopoly.
  3. Dwight D. Eisenhower is fluent in Ostrich. This confusion lead to his promotion of Military Governor of the U.S. Occupation Zone after WWII. He said he spoke Ostrich. They thought he said Österreich, which is German for "Austria."
  4. Dwight D. Eisenhower had a third arm growing from his chest, which he kept concealed.
  5. Dwight D. Eisenhower never slept. He would instead close his eyes and practice astral projection to spy on his enemies and supermodels.
  6. Dwight D. Eisenhower once wrestled a bear. Though it was unanimously decreed Ike won the fight, critics tend to agree that the bear had the better costume and signature move.
  7. Dwight D. Eisenhower played Dracula in the first major movie of the title. Out of modesty, he gave the credit to a poor immigrant friend of his named Bela Lugosi, who spoke no English.
  8. Dwight D. Eisenhower never touched the floor of the White House, instead choosing to ride a pony from room to room.
  9. When in charge of the European Theatre of Operations in WWII, Dwight D. Eisenhower put on a production of Showboat so good that D-Day was delayed, even though it meant landing on the beachhead in bad weather.
  10. Dwight D. Eisenhower went down in history for being the first person to not only hold his own breath for ten minutes, but to hold someone else's breath as well at the same time.
And people call him a "Do-Nothing President" Bah!

You have been informed.


Anonymous said...

this stuff is bullS**t

Anonymous said...

i am doing a report for school and i am going to put this stuff in it haha

Mr. Truth said...

Good luck on that grade

Blah Blah Blah said...

This is so gay! they are all fake so nobody copy them or use them!

Anonymous said...

This is so fake. Claps for maturity.

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Anonymous said...

wow real mature making this! like honestly yu couldnt get any stupider...